Going Within To Avoid Being Without

I have officially been blogging on my own personal website for a good two years now. This is a major feat for me, since staying committed to anything aside from taking care of my cat or watching Love & Hip-Hop Atlanta faithfully, is quite a challenge. So, cheers to many more years and the evolution that is LiLi Sheree.

Speaking of evolution: I made a decision at 3 am Sunday morning, in the midst of watching Beyoncé’s #Beychella set live on YouTube, that I was going to take a two-week hiatus from the outside world. No interactions with friends, minimal interactions with family, no socializing, drinking, partying, etc. The next two weeks are all about inner-retrospection and reflection for the wonderful things to come. I am in the midst of transforming my life for the better and manifesting some major things from making creative business decisions to settling down with a husband and creating a family.

During the recently lifted Mercury Retrograde, it would be safe to say that a majority of my old flames came back to haunt me. I take that back, because usually I’m the one doing the haunting, but they were definitely trying to creep back into my vagina life, slowly but surely. The “new phone, who dis?” responses were off the chain. Some hit me up via Facebook messenger or Instagram DM because they didn’t even have my number any longer (that’s a serious reach, breh).

I didn’t find any of this unusual since Mercury was indeed on retrograde status and that’s what usually happens. The frequency and percentage of “reach-outs” are what caught me off guard but I soon figured out that it was a mass purging. When you are finally honest with yourself and put out into the Universe what it is you desire, the opposite sometimes takes place as a “quality check”. All of this pretty much said to me: I hear you saying what you desire and I’m willing to give you just that but let’s make sure we remove these old bones out of your closet before proceeding. I got it.

Also, within the past few weeks I realized it was time to leave my current job position of three years. Everything had been on a slow roll as far as promotion and a raise was concerned but I waited it out, only to get dropped back to the bottom of the roller-coaster directly afterwards. There’s no need to get into details but I felt all the unnecessary side-steps happening and started to plan my exit strategy. However, doing so in the midst of a retrograde is not a smart move so all sorts of mishaps were going on with hiring managers and recruiters. I knew it would be best to wait it out and not accept a new position at this time so I let it go.

The goal is to go within so I won’t be with-out.

Manifesting certain things in your life should always be preceded by inner reflection and meditation. The mind and imagination are a breeding ground for conception. As a woman who has the power to carry and protect life inside of her, it’s the same concept with any and everything I want to give life to. I’ve lost my way and have been trying to figure it all out, externally, but I need to be still and allow the God in me to speak. I need wisdom and guidance from my spirit guides aka ancestors. There are a host of family members in the spiritual realm who have been through this lifetime and are fully equipped to show me the way.

I’ve known for over a month that I was long overdue for a shut down but it took my sister and tribe-member to get me together and reinforce the importance of it. Both of us are into tarot cards and will occasionally do self-reading on ourselves and she said “go home, pull out your cards and see if the Hermit card comes up.”

Eerily enough, this was the first card that popped out but in reverse, as you can see. It’s a card of ascension, illumination and introspection- everything that I need at this time in my life.

The reversed Hermit can go one of two ways. You are either not taking enough time for personal reflection, or you are taking too much. If you are struggling to connect more deeply with your spiritual self, the Hermit reversed encourages you to create more time and space so that you can meditate and reflect on your spiritual self. It is time to go more deeply into your inner being and rediscover your greater meaning and purpose on this earth. You may have been so busy dealing with the day-to-day issues that you have forgotten to reflect inwardly and listen to your inner voice. The Hermit asks you to search deep within your soul to help you find your way again and to focus on rebuilding yourself on a spiritual level.” 

I’ve had a few previews of what can manifest in my life if I sit still enough to draw it in. Running around never did me any good except cause me to rush things unnecessarily or miss the mark on what I thought I needed and wanted. I’m being intentional with what I believe to be possible for my life and holding steadfast to conforming myself to line up in accordance to it all. I’m no longer tap-dancing my way through or winging it.

In the words of Prophetess Belcalis Almanzar aka Cardi B: “I don’t dance now…I make money moves!”

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